I did not find a sharp tool to defend myself but the controller would do the trick

I opened the door of my rented apartment a few months ago, leaving my noisy and disturbing family home despite my parents' refusal to do so, but I followed my dictates. I entered and threw everything with my hand from the keys and bags of some of the ready-made food that I had bought over the table. I was on the couch to sleep or to nap for a few minutes before I heard the sound of an instant impact on the floor from the kitchen. I was the hero of the cinema and I was her hero, and quickly moved to reality, the room was dark and so was the whole house, I remained silent and fortunately I was close to the door and there was no escape except the door. I could not escape, I extended my hand to the table and then felt the things above. I did not find a sharp tool to defend myself, but the controller would do the job or I thought so. I was the owner of the house and knew how to walk in the dark without events. I did not hear a movement inside the kitchen. Maybe he heard me but I can not enter in fear of being armed and hurt, but I will not enter, but I will try to insert my head to see where he is, if he is close to him. If he was far away, I waited for him to come out to destroy him. I put my four limbs above the ground and stretched my neck to look But I did not feel lighter if the villains did not light the kitchen. The light of the lamp hurt my eyes. I could not see anything. I was in my position, so the situation became more complicated. I quickly threw the device inside, so it might hit someone. To hear the sound of the fire, so I covered myself with my head hidden in my hands so as not to get hurt and began to get them the ugliest insults I know, at least defend myself with my mouth, but quickly stopped and red-faced after hearing "Happy Birthday "And the crackers started, I raised my head to find my friends and apparently they had set up a party with me On the day of my birthday and for the rest of the situation I stood and I rubbed the back of my head with my hand and repeated "I walk in my sleep a lot these days hahaha". The dreaded telecommond settled in the middle of the cake